Sunday, 31 August 2008

Banbury Cross

The Academic lives in Banbury. That’s fine in terms of time; not much more than 90 minutes on the train. Not so nice in terms of cost/planning. The hoops I have to jump through helps me dimly understand why long distance relationships often don’t work. One can’t choose when to travel and manage costs at the same time (one or the other; the Eisenbahn Uncertainty Principle), which means one’s sex life, love life, social life are in the hands of some outside agency – in this case Chiltern Railways. For example, Chiltern Railways seems to consider the privilege of staying the night with The Academic should command a surcharge of £27.

Actually it’s not so bad, though I wish I knew when I would get paid next so I could plan ahead – the baseline scenario I’m thinking about, pending things developing nicely, is alternate weekends (him to me and me to him). Maybe I should use the excuse to buy a car… but there’re ways of minimising the cost should things settle down into a relationship/routine.

It’s going to be tough in any event to juggle a hugely busy job, business clients (which with luck should start becoming more frequent from the last quarter of this calendar year) and a long distance relationship plus gym (honest guv’), friends etc.

Is this infatuated blouse Mike as per usual? No, no… I’m just willing to start a relationship with the Academic – so being a Thinker this is what I’m Thinking about. We’ll see how it goes. Careful planning and dollops of maturity is what this will require, if ‘this’ turns out to be something.

The first step to that is our next date; Wednesday evening and it is at the Academic’s place. He himself said he would come to me the next time “if we got that far”, as he put it. This business with Gareth has left me feeling uncertain about whether I should go 'all the way' with the Academic on Wednesday or leave it a while yet. Well, events will take their course – believe me I get far too excited to care about the proprieties and conventions; but then that may be my undoing!

On Sunday Gareth called as arranged and he ultimately explained that having had time to think he sees no future for us (despite me being very nice and his enjoying our time together). I suppose him taking the time to explain that to me does him credit; though my tip for anyone thinking about doing the same is never never never tell the dumpee you regret having sex with them (on a first date in this instance but the principle is a general one I would suggest).

How did I take the news? Rule 4! Rule 4! I was calm, though very upset on the inside. I am, in fact, quite angry – I feel robbed that someone could make that kind of decision about me so precipitately. But I suppose I haven’t got space to dwell; a new job tomorrow, the Academic on Wednesday, another date in London on Thursday and then a weekend in Edinburgh… if not a smitten kitten then still a busy bee. No time for feelings!


Monty said...

OK, I'm catching up on the last couple of posts...firstly, sorry to hear that it didn't work out with Gareth. BUT onto bigger and better things...The Academic. He sounds lovely! Though what's with all the travelling??? Can't you find someone who lives in London? When I was there, there were buckets of hot guys - surely there's gotta be one or two who are local??? Anyway, good luck on Wednesday. :-)

Kris said...

Sorry to hear about things not working out with Gareth. Try not to be too hard on yourself since he just has some things he's dealing with that might have nothing to do with you. But yea, I'm sure that's rough having someone tell you they regret having sex with you on the first night.

As much as you avoid it, it happens though ya know!? I don't set out to "do it" when I go on dates but it still happens. I'm the one that gets weirded out (kicking myself for it) and not see them again.

Good luck with The Academic. Enjoy it and wait and see where it leads. But yea, can't you find anyone closer!!? Hahaha

I actually had a pseudo-bf there for a week that I came to visit but that was ages ago. I soo wanna go back to London :D

Take care!