Monday 30 January 2012

The Good Wife


In mid-February I start a new secondment in the Chief Executive’s office of the organisation I work for. It’s great to have a new opportunity – I will be focusing more on corporate governance and risk management rather than business management which will be a good change. A sideways promotion, if you will, and perhaps the nicest thing is I will be working directly for the head of the LGBT group, who has been double-plus supportive of me and other gay colleagues in the office.

It’s only nine months, but I’m very much looking forward to the change of setting, work and pace.

Of course I still need to do my project, dissertation and study for my exams, so it will be tough to manage but I know with Fella’s support I shall be able to manage.

Fella of course needs my support too, both with the physical and the emotional side of looking after his mother, and also with his own career.

He is on secondment too, of course, and he is doing very well in his role. He’s such a sweetheart it’s nice he can work to his strengths and capabilities as well as being uber-popular in his own office.

Part of supporting him is playing the good wife; where he works has lots of social and work events and it is politic to be there to support him and hob with the nobs. It’s a bit like being a politician’s wife; smile and wave, smile and wave… although as we both work in healthcare I can hold my own with anyone there. I enjoy it, but I have to be pretty and witty and gay regardless of my mood!

This weekend it was the highlight of the season, the annual ball. I went the whole hog and bought a new DJ for the occasion. As this is the third such occasion I’ve been to I saw loads of people I know; a lot of the people Fella works with have become good friends. I’m told the cheerful fairy was on top form, which is good. They do like the keep the wine flowing at these things…

I really do think it is a strength of our relationship that we are mutually supporting each other’s careers; and I’m very proud that I’ve been able to support fella in getting his career going well. Admittedly I am pleased that I get paid more than him, but every little helps as we plan for our civil partnership and our life after that. Of course we have to support each other in lots of ways, but really I do enjoy hanging off his arm at a do or two.

Monday 16 January 2012

Happy New Year

Yes Gentle Reader I fear I have neglected you for most of January. But the Cheerful Fairy is back in Strumpetville, and more than happy to discuss my favourite subject – Me.

Have I been idle? No, far from it!

I have submitted by dissertation proposal form to my university for my research project; I’ll write more about that soon – my first meeting with my department head is on Wednesday, and while alongside the regular study and work it will be a big challenge, it’s a topic I’m very keen on – yes it is gay themed – and I’m eager to get started.

I have started my medication regime and I’m back at the gym so I’m pleased to write my health is getting back on an even keel. My New Year diet is going well, although I fell off the wagon rather at the weekend for a friend’s birthday.

On top of this I have been applying for new jobs and had an interview last Friday – I’m pretty sure I didn’t get the job but hey-ho it’s all good experience.

Work continues busy and I’m eager, obviously, to move on to my next career step. However, while I’m there I’m still an active member of the LGBT group and we’re working to celebrate gay history month in February.

Fella continues fine and we are as strong as ever. Domestic bliss reigns. We socialise with our friends; we enjoy each other’s company; the wedding planning continues at its slow pace. We have our synergy – he cooks, I eat; I diet; he loses weight.

There are down sides. Fella’s mother is increasingly unwell. Her liver cancer is terminal and over Christmas it was clear she is going downhill. Caring for her will be a big part of our year. However long she lasts – and of course we will have to think about changing the date of our civil partnership to take into account, bluntly, how long she will be around and healthy enough to attend.

All in all there’s lots going on in 2012, and lots will happen. So, to finish off this breathless guide to an average man’s life, I have decided simply not to have New Year’s resolutions. Nope. Why write something down I can look at in 12 months and go “ah. Forgot about these…”? Instead I will keep trying to be the best me I can possibly be. This will include resisting the temptation to set fire to my office.