Monday 9 June 2008

Come hither

Saturday’s date went well enough; as I wrote before this psychometrics business works really well. Over my octopus (very nice by the way) in Soho we put the world to rights once again, and afterward we went for a drink to talk some more… and something occurred to me.

I’m still so new at this I rely on the other guy to make his move. I was really quite keen for muches smooches with this one but because he didn’t initiate it didn’t happen. God knows I gave enough ‘come hither’ signals but, ho hum, nothing doing.

When we parted, a lot later than I intended, we did kiss, but lips not tongues. Ho hum indeed. And I waited so long for even that I missed my last train! Anyway, I sent a text saying what a great time I had and that next time we’d have to kiss properly; no reply yet – we’ll see.

But that leads us nicely onto today, and today of course was the third date with Mark. Well, that’s what was planned anyway.

This morning I sent him a text message explaining that I like the cut of his jib and speculating about today’s activities. He’d been out of London visiting friends and was on his way back to meet me, but sure enough he replied positively... Sadly, he left a little late and got stuck in traffic on the way so by the time he got back to London we were confronted with either having a very rushed time together somewhere in town, or postponing. So, over the phone, we agreed to postpone. After all I’ve fallen so far behind with work it would be a good time to catch up and… yeah, and…

And then it hit me: what the hell are you doing? You like this one, so why play the coy minx and act the courgette?!

So I called him back, suggesting we should have a nightcap at his place and, what with him being nearby and all, I was there in a flash with a selection of nice new world wines and my finest bedroom eyes.

I knew I couldn’t stay long, but I’m still really glad I went. Yes a lot of fun was had but there’s more to it.

We’ve now been to each other’s place, which feels symbolically important (mainly because Darren usually used mine; What’shisname and Harry used mine; and with my other erstwhile ‘regulars’ it’s always one place or the other, never both).

Most importantly though a chance to say how much I liked him and how much I want to keep seeing him. I wanted to let him know because he makes me feel like I should make an effort to be nicer, take care of myself, clean the flat more, and just generally prove myself worthy; with others it's been more "do you slot into my life, or not?" whereas now it's more "my life has to change for this to work". I have genuinely prayed please don’t let me fuck this one up please don’t.

Of course one of the things I need to bear in mind is I’m, right now, more into him than he's into me - to be sure, gentle reader, I know he does like me - and I need to be a bit canny here. But, OK, with time and effort it will become… Something.

And the next step to Something is the cinema on Friday. Five whole days… dangnamit.

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