Thursday, 3 September 2009

Speed dating

Following some recent good advice – and proving the value of posting this blog – I tried to talk to Fella last night about various things. Feelings and that. I wanted to let him know he’s my number one priority but that life being the thing what it is, I had a number of pressures that prevented me being the perfect boyfriend. Not by much of course. Just a wee dram shy.

In truth he still confuses me sometimes. The reverse psychology of his ignoring my pursuit; but challenging me when I ignore him persists still. But we make progress nonetheless. So it somewhat threw/surprised/pleased/???’d me when, after setting out my feelings, and convinced he had ignored me in favour of the TV, he began to talk about us moving in together.

Not very soon; in the next couple of years, say. He made it quite clear that my and him and The Gardener will not a happy home make. So it would have to be very much our place.

It doesn’t seem ridiculously early to be talking about moving in together. It is, after all, rather hypothetical. We surely wouldn’t be buying somewhere together so the risks are not huge [are they?]. It does, however, occur to me that when we talk about moving in together we have to talk about money and career aspirations and personal tastes. And all manner of things that may cause tensions. It assumes we know each other as well as perhaps we don’t. It, in short, stretches Trust.

So many ideas run through my head when I think about moving in with Fella. We certainly would need room. A place where we could be apart from each other from time to time lest things get to a head. Introverted and cerebral as we both are, close quarters would do more harm then good after a while. To be honest, three or fours nights a week is quite enough for me for now. I really do like a bit of quiet time from time to time!!

But also I think about what kind of place we would both like. And where it would be both convenient for work and for his family, to whom he is close, to visit. I really am, secretly, taken with the idea. And if we’re talking a couple of years then… well, gentle reader, why not?


Antony said...

I'm glad you both discussed things.

:D That's the wonderful thing about relationships, making the plans.


A x

Mike said...

Yeah. I like making plans and it seems we are planning kinda the same things... of course some of my plans are a big secret so shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ;-)