Monday, 24 August 2009

Night and Day

This weekend I suffered from a combination of a bad cold and conjunctivitis. Fortunately Fella was there to look after me and nurse me with nourishing soup and keep me warm. But I’m not 100 per cent better today so it’s a tired and grumpy Frumpella posting for you now.

I took it easy at work today, given how rotten I feel, and came home early. I wanted to avoid the Gardener; he has some character traits that veer (at least for me) from amusing the tiresome when one is under the weather. Besides, I had some messages to reply to and some food shopping to do. Friends on the phone, by text, and by email to keep me entertained… and a quiet (and early) night in has its appeal sometimes.

Of course there was nothing on the tele and the DVDs didn’t grab me. No more gaydar, not for me gentle reader, oh no. So it was Top Gear on the good old iPlayer and some more nourishing soup for dinner.

It occurred to me that this is how it is for that half the week my Fella isn’t here. I’m surprised at myself really. I’m a terrible introvert so I would have supposed that ‘quiet time’ would re-energise me and refresh me for the next time I see him. But no. I’m sad and down; and it’s cheap plonk; a sore throat; missing his arms around me and mine around him, for me tonight. And every night when he’s not here *sigh* (except the sore throat!).

We already have plans for next weekend and it will come around soon enough. I do need the down-time to concentrate on work and business and friends and laundry and shouting at the bank and all the humdrum things that never seem to impinge on romance as seen on TV. But still, I’d really like it if he were here. Doesn’t have to be any naughty fun or anything… though it would be nice :-)

It’s peculiar an otherwise full and busy life is tinged with a hint of sadness purely because Fella isn’t around - and risks being entirely abandoned when he is. I did wonder as things developed whether I’d be caught in the trap of wanting him when he’s not here, and wishing he were gone when he is. So far so good, though.

Well, I suppose that’s enough of that before I drift off into the analysis that he really doesn't like. So let us pass through the darkness, gentle reader, and head toward the light.

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