Thursday, 23 July 2009


Virtually every day my first though is about Fella and my wish to wake up with hm. I suppose it seems somewhat rambling-cum-soppy, gentle reader. I feel very lucky to have him.

I’ve posted before about he’s been distant when I compliment him or am affectionate. But I’m learning to recognise how much he gives to our relationship on every level. And he’s certainly much warmer about giving and receiving affection; we become more intimate on every level. I am, to put it mildly, satisfied. Content.

We went out last night to the Host Gallery on Honduras Street near Barbican to watch a screening of “Hell House”, a documentary about the efforts of a small conservative Christian congregation in the southern United States to graphically demonstrate their beliefs in a house of horror style showing. The documentary was very well made with the filmmakers passively observing the group planning and executing the event. Of course it was the usual: anti-abortion, anti-gay, anti-premarital sex. The characters were sensitively portrayed and it didn’t try to get a rise out of them – it was well worth seeing.

We went home and there was wine and we talked until the early hours. Thus, and for other reasons, I have had very little sleep and once again my quiet evening in allows me to catch up on my rest – as I know he is at his home.

One aspect of our relationship is that we are planning relatively far ahead. As well as Fella’s birthday in mid-September around which there are tentative plans we have arranged things around the end of August and beginning of September. It seems strange to be in a position where we can plan six weeks ahead; it’s only nine weeks we’ve been together!

Fella and I are spending a record breaking three nights together at his home in Buckinghamshire, from 1 August. It feels to me like a romantic break away. I hope preparing for my arrival and having me there won’t stress him out!!

Of course having a hectic work life doesn’t help. I was an hour late meeting him yesterday because of a new service set up to manage the aporkalypse. I’m very keen not to be late for the romantic dinner we’ve planned to start off next weekend – so that in turn means planning my work very carefully. The holistic nature of a relationship, compared to dating. Dating fits around other commitments. My boyfriend and I fit things around us!!

This weekend is a quiet one. The first in a few. Sadly I shall probably be getting on with nothing more than a spot of work and doing work on the house with the Gardener. I think I’ll spend it productively planning nice things – wonderful things, perhaps – for Fella and I to do. Small things as well as big… but things for us. Because actions speak louder than words.


Antony said...

Yeah I love planning things when I'm in a relationship too.

"I feel very lucky to have him."

Never ever stop feeling this.


A x

Mike said...

Fingers crossed.

And hugs back